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NEWSLETTER
- NOVEMBER 2005
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CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE NEWSLETTER ARCHIVES
CONTENTS
Ed's Note
Because I said so… your monthly column from
the editor
Featured Article: Surviving Colic, from the experts at Bennetts
Quick Coffee Break: Quote
of the month from Mrs Beeton's Household Management
Special Announcement! Book launch in Cape Town!
Link up!
Giveaways! See what's on offer this month
Noticeboard: Useful stuff!
In Closing...
Ed's Note
This month hasn't got a theme - sorry if you were expecting one, deal with it! I have been so busy of late that I am very proud of my capabilities for actually getting around to my newsletter - it is after all like a second child to me - absolutely loved and cherished but seeming to always demand my attention when I have other things to do! And to top if off I had an unexpected house guest for a week, which was wonderful as it is a friend we haven't seen for two years, but of course it makes more demands on precious time! Anyway to make it up to you, I have some exciting things lined up for you in the next month or so, including some great December giveaways (just in time for the holidays) and a book launch happening in Cape Town - so watch this space! I will be sending you more details about the launch in the near future. Watch this space! I have also sourced a great article on colic from the team at Bennetts - something very close to my heart as when I was going through it with Megan I didn't understand it and couldn't find much information on it. If any readers out there have tips on colic, please send it to me to add to my new Colic Corner on the website!
Because
I said so…
Someone sent me a great email the other day about the order of kids, and how things change as you get through each one. I have only one so far and already can relate to a lot of what the email said – I don't think it only applies to the amount of children you have, but also how long you have had them. It went something like this…
Child number one. You plan your dates, make sure hubby gets home early at the right time, and get things started. Before long you think you are pregnant, you hope with all hopes. You take the home test, it's positive! You rush out to every pharmacy within a five mile radius and buy a whole lot more, just to be sure. Then you go for the blood test – yes you are definitely pregnant – so you book an appointment with the gynae, and wait for full confirmation and the first twelve weeks before you tell anyone, just bursting with excitement struggling to keep it to yourself.
You spend hours paging through every baby book and magazine you can lay your hands on, speak to everyone you know who has had a baby, discuss birthing options, attend antenatal classes, you name it, you will do it. Then there are the maternity clothes – a whole new adventure. Traditional dungarees, elasticated pants, expandable jeans, and one cute Marion & Lindie number for special occasions, not to mention maternity bras and supportive panties. You can't wait for your bump to show and to start feeling the first stirrings of baby kicking, you just want the whole world to know, and spend your life browsing the baby section of Woollies, washing and rewashing the tiniest little outfits, setting up the nursery, getting everything organised. Then the big day arrives, you go gung-ho ready to take the pain, determined to truly be one with your baby, bonding as only a woman can to mother earth. And at last you are a family, baby lovingly nurtured at your breast, ready to go home to the magazine style nursery to start the journey ahead of you. And don't forget to have the dummy sterilise solution handy for when it accidentally falls on the ground.
Child Number two. Somehow it happens that you forget the sleepless nights, the screaming, the exhaustion… and you decide to start on round two. You sort of take it as it comes, hoping that it won't take long, that when the time is right it will happen. And then… hmm you aren't feeling yourself, a bit bloated, tummy queasy… You take a home test, and yes, again you are pregnant. Well you know now that those tests are pretty accurate, so you book that gynae appointment, dreading the inevitable prodding and probing. You sort of mention in passing to your baby group friends, oh, I'm pregnant again, and of course there are hugs and kisses all around.
You might pick up some of your baby books again, but soon realise that those baby magazines run in nine month cycles and you have read it all before. Plus now you have hands on, real life experience, you know what you are doing. You dig out those old maternity clothes, borrow some from a friend, and you are all set to go. Toddler gets moved into a bed to make space for the new baby, old baby clothes get hauled out, throw out very stained ones, wash reusable ones, and buy one or two new things. You enjoy the first stirrings of movement in your belly, but you are not looking forward to the discomfort that you know you are headed towards… swollen ankles, aching back, heartburn… And then the actual birth comes along, a quick ‘yes please' to the pethadine drip, not too fazed about a Caesar… You will give the breastfeeding a try, hope for the best, but bottles are always an option. When baby comes home you get the routine started as soon as possible, and a little crying never hurt anyone – at least this time it's only the baby crying, and not you. Oh and tap water is just as good as dummy sterilising solution...
Child number three. Running around after two children leaves you pretty much exhausted all the time, so you don't even notice that you are a little more tired than usual. Then you start depositing the morning's Frosted Flakes into the toilet (did you really think that after two kids you would have time to actually make toast and tea?), and your waistline starts thickening. And you say to yourself ‘here we go again…' and try to think back to when you actually found the energy to do the act that got you to this point… again. You send out a group email announcing the imminent arrival, but most of your friends are too busy with their own kids to reply, offering their congrats when they pass you in the frozen food aisle at Pick n Pay.
You have already given away all your maternity clothes, and anyway they wouldn't fit anymore – gone are the days of a cute preggie tum peaking out from above well toned hips and behind with a pert cleavage showing discretely higher up. Hubby's tracksuit pants will do just fine thank you. Once again out comes the hand-me-downs, does it really matter if there are butternut stains on the babygro? It's just going to get puked on so what's the difference? And can a boy sleep in his sister's pink sleeping bag? You are too busy fetching, carrying, bending, picking up, etc. etc. etc. to even notice the movement inside until you feel a foot wedged up under your ribcage, and by then you just want this baby out so that you can touch your knees again – forget toes, those were out of reach years ago. Birth options are once again discussed, and you happily book a Caesar on a day convenient for all parties concerned. You farm the kids off to your in-laws, book in the night before to enjoy a catered meal – hey anything you don't have to cook yourself and you can serve without tomato sauce is luxury, even if it is served in a hospital bed! You hope you remembered to run the bottles through the dishwasher – breastfeeding is for the birds! And so baby comes home, and your little family oohs and aahs over their new baby brother, but soon the novelty wears off and arguments abound. You hardly hear the new baby crying anymore what with the shouts of ‘Mommmmeeee, Jenna's got my Barrrbieeeee” and the “but I had it fiiiirrsssst” drowning out any sounds in the background. And wiping his dummy on yesterday's shirt should be okay, right?
Child number four. Are you completely insane? Have you not yet learnt? But you wouldn't change it for the world. None of us would. Children are what makes life. Period. And forget dummies – his thumb will have to do.
I leave you with this lovely poem sent in by one of our reader's – thanks Linda. I have condensed it, but you can email me if you want to read the full version...
To my child...
Just for this morning, I am going to smile when I see your face and laugh when I feel like crying.
Just for this morning, I will let you choose what you want to wear, and smile and say how perfect it is.
Just for this morning, I am going to step over the laundry, and pick you up and take you to the park to play.
Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.
Just for this afternoon, I will not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and whine for the ice cream truck, and I will buy you one if he comes by.
Just for this afternoon, I will let you help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you trying to fix them.
Just for this evening, I will hold you in my arms and tell you a story about how you were born and how much I love you.
Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside you for hours, and miss my favourite TV shows.
Just for this evening when I run my finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be grateful that I have been given the greatest gift ever given.
And when I kiss you good night I will hold you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then, that I will pray for you, and ask for nothing, except one more day…
Featured
Article: Surviving Colic
From the experts at Bennetts
Introduction
It is normal for babies to cry, as this is their main method of communication. There are several reasons as to why babies cry and these include hunger, dirty nappies and bad moods. Babies may also cry because they are uncomfortable from sitting or lying in one position for too long. Perhaps they feel too hot, too cold, bored, ignored or just plain moody. The crying that lasts after the apparent cause has been removed by the mommy (or daddy) i.e. after feeding him, changing him etc, is the crying that needs closer evaluation.
Thus when a healthy baby cries inconsolably and this crying lasts for more than three hours (often even longer) and this happens for at least three days in a given week, this baby will be diagnosed as having colic. During this period of crying, the baby will be irritable and will appear to have severe abdominal pain and he will not respond to the usual methods that his mom uses to comfort him.
Often the baby will start crying at the same time every day, usually after a feed.In many cases the crying starts in the late afternoon or early evening and continues for at least three or four hours. Sometimes this crying lasts much longer and in severe cases it can last almost all of the night or day.
Colic occurs in approximately 20% of all babies and more often than not it occurs in the firstborn baby. Colic also tends to affect more boys than girls.
This infant condition is a nightmare for parents and will generate a great deal of anxiety, desperation, concern, guilt and even anger in the parents and will often leave the parents and the baby feeling exhausted and upset. But despite the distress and discomfort, babies suffering with colic are usually well, thriving, gaining weight and healthy in all other respects and the phase does pass.
What are symptoms of colic?
Babies suffering with colic do have varying symptoms, however these are some of the typical features of colic:
- Baby often draws his knees up to his chest
- Baby may clench his fists
- Baby's cry is loud, continuous and intense and will last for hours
- Baby may go red in the face (flushed)
- Baby arches his back
- Baby's stomach may be swollen and feel hard
- Baby may hold his breath for short periods
When does colic start?
In most cases colic usually develops in the second or third week of baby's life and worsens after one month when baby is six weeks old. At around twelve weeks of life it starts to improve with some babies settling quickly and others improving slowly.
The colic can start at a later period, but most babies are free of colic by the time they reach six months of age. Thus colic usually lasts for a period of three months. Premature babies tend to start and finish their colic later than term babies.
What causes colic?
Unfortunately it is still not exactly clear what causes colic, although there are a number of theories that have been put forward:
- It is most commonly believed that colic is caused by baby's immature digestive tract, which cramps up and becomes painful when there is a build up of wind in the intestine. This may be because of baby's inability to digest some of his feed and also because some air may be swallowed during a feed or crying.
Thus the most classical definition of colic is the discomfort caused by baby's digestive system not working to its full potential. This causes sections of the intestine to cramp resulting in crying, screaming, restlessness, poor sleeping and desperate parents. - It is also believed that some baby's have immature central nervous systems. Most newborn's have a built in mechanism to block out unwanted stimuli e.g. noise and light, so they can eat and sleep undisturbed by their surroundings. However by one month old, this ability wears off and baby becomes more aware and alert to his surroundings.
- Feeding the baby too little or too much and starting solids too early, before the gastro intestinal tract is sufficiently mature, have also been labeled as causes of colic
- It is believed that certain foods that breastfeeding mothers eat could reach their babies via their breast milk. These foods include caffeine, dairy products and nuts.
- Some people believe that babies may have spinal pain due to the position they take up in the mothers womb.
- Obviously it is very heart wrenching for a parent, particularly a mother, to witness their baby crying incessantly and so intensely, leaving them feeling desperate, guilty, tired and incompetent. This maternal stress may cause the mother to respond to the baby in a way that perpetuates or worsens the colic. Therefore it is important for a mom to relax and know that there are ways to deal with this infant condition and that the phase does pass.
What can be done for a baby with colic?
Whenever a baby cries more than usual, whether due to colic or any other cause, it is important that your doctor diagnoses what is wrong with your baby. The doctor must thoroughly examine your baby to rule out treatable causes of unexplained crying such as infections (viral or bacterial), gastro-intestinal dysfunction, an anal fissure (i.e. a slight tear of the anus), reflux, allergies or whether your baby is lactose intolerant etc.
The doctor may need to assess your baby's diet, bowel movements, urination or sleeping habits. Once the above have been ruled out, and your baby has been diagnosed as having infantile colic, there are a number of measures that you may do to help ease his discomfort (i.e. his colic). These options are a matter of trial and error, and what works for one baby may not work for another.
- Wind the baby to help release a build up of gas in the intestines.
- To help winding, place a warm water bottle on your lap. Cover it with a thick towel and lie your baby across your lap on his tummy; gently rub his back.
- Winding can also be done by gently rocking baby in your arms. Another popular method is to keep your baby as upright as possible (a baby carrier works well, or carrying baby on your back) - the vertical position and gentle bouncing movements automatically burp baby and the closeness and motion are soothing.
- If winding does not work, the baby's abdomen can be gently massaged to release gas. This is best done in small circular movements ten minutes after winding.
- Essential oils such as coriander, cardamom and dill may be used to enhance the massage.
- Reduce the stimulation in your baby's room, such as bright lights, noise and unnecessary activity. What may be helpful however, is calming background music which has proven to help reduce crying.
- Taking your baby out for a walk or a drive is a popular method.
- Some people recommend the services of a chiropractor. Use one who is renowned for working with babies.
- Homeopathic remedies such as Mag Phos and Chamomilla/Millefolium drops may help reduce the spasms and cramps.
- Try using a dummy/pacifier.
- Ask your doctor or pharmacist to prescribe or recommend an over the counter remedy.
- Breastfeeding moms should eliminate foods that are passed on to their baby via their breast milk that may cause colic. It is suggested that such foods include stimulants such as caffeine, as well as chocolate, nuts and dairy products.
- Look after yourself. Remember that your own stress level will affect your baby. Parents of colicky babies are usually exhausted and at their wits end. Don't try to cope alone. An exhausted, frantic parent is likely to compound the problem. Parents of an incessantly crying infant see the crying as an indictment of their own care giving ability and often feel that it is their fault and that they are bad parents. Get support from family and friends that you can trust and let them baby sit for you.
© Bennetts. For more information on Bennett's products see www.bennettsforbabies.co.za. For information on Bennett's colic remedy contact david@colic.co.za.
Ed's Note: If you are feeling overwhelmed or depressed please get support! Speak to your doctor, paed or midwife, or even someone who has been there before! I am no expert but have been through it in spades, and am happy to take emails at sally@mumstheword.co.za if you need someone to just listen! Or post to our message forum to share with other mums.
Quick Coffee Break: Quote of the month from Mrs Beeton's Household Management
This month's gem comes from the chapter entitled: "The Art of Cookery" (chapter VIII for reference's sake!):
"Reason's for cooking. Food is prepared for many reasons, of which six may be enumerated: (1) To render mastication easy; (2) to facilitate digestion; (3) to convert certain naturally hurtful substances into nutricious foods; (4) to eliminate harmful parasites and ptomaines sometimes developed in foods; (5) to combine the right foods in proper proportions for the needs of the body; (6) to make food agreeable to the palate and pleasing to the eye. It may be said that the last "reason" is in contradiction to No 2; that is only apparently so. Apart from the purely aesthetic value of an agreeable meal and a well-spread table, there are many solid arguements for reason No. 6. 'The eye does half the eating'."
Personally number 6 is pretty much the only reason I eat. In fact I could wittle that entire paragraph down to one sentence: "Reason for cooking: To eat". In fact, why cook? A bar of chocolate will do. Oh and if anyone knows what ptomaines are, please let me know. More words of wisdom next month!
SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT! BOOK LAUNCH IN CAPE TOWN!
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Mum's the Word in collaboration with Struik brings you the exciting launch of Sam Cowen's Waiting for Christopher . Sam is a well known Johannesburg based radio personality and journalist. She is renowned for her outrageous sense of humour and will be launching her book in Cape Town with hilarious anecdotes of becoming a mother. The launch will take place on the 30th of November 2005 at 3:30 pm at Burgundy Bistro in Claremont, and all Mum's the Word readers are invited! Of course we need to finalise numbers and venue asap so to incentivise |
Link up! www.bennettsforbabies.co.za
This site has been set up as a guide to the many uses of Bannetts' quality baby care products - some of the building blocks in your baby's growth. See all the products that Bennetts has to offer and get some useful information on breastfeeding and caring for your baby's skin. For more information see www.bennettsforbabies.co.za.
P.S.: Don't forget to add your views on anything and everything to the forum on www.mumstheword.co.za!
Back
to contents
WINWINWIN! This Month's Giveaways!
Bennetts Hamper
Having a new baby and need those special products to keep them (and you!) pampered? Take a look at Bennetts range of products, from Baby Bum Cream, Aqueous Cream and soat to Nipple Cream and Eazi Breathe Strips. Bennetts are giving away a hamper containing one of every one of their products, as well as a cute teddy for your little one. To enter send an email with "Bennetts Giveaway" in the subject line to sally@mumstheword.co.za. Closing date 25 November 2005.
Diody Cups
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These UK imported cups are especially designed for little hands and mouths . The slanted design helps little ones to see the level of the liquid inside, avoiding those nasty juice-all-over-my-face accidents that seem to happen, particularly when they are first starting to use a cup! Drinking from a cup is also considered healthier for all-round oral development, |
Noticeboard: This is your space! Submit your comments, ideas or suggestions on anything you have seen or want to see in Mum's the Word. This is also a space to advertise child related products or services, be they your own or something interesting that you have seen or heard about. Email me your contributions and if I deem them suitable I will happily put them up!
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Don't forget to help with our local charity, The Bag Ladies, who collect goodies to put into little bags to hand out to children being admitted to the Red Cross Children's Hospital. They are looking for goodies to fill their bags, such as toiletries (soap, faceclothes, etc.) and activity items, such as small puzzles, crayons, colouring books, etc. If you would like to donate any items you can contact me directly: sally@mumstheword.co.za. |
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Cheryl, one of our reader's has recently joined her husband in Johannesburg with a 3 and a half month son Cameron. She will be there until May next year, and would love to meet up with other mums at baby groups while she is there. Cheryl would also like to keep up her son's swimming lessons, so if anyone out there would like to meet up with Cheryl or send some swimming numbers my way (I will add them to my directory), please email me at sally@mumstheword.co.za and I will send your details on to Cheryl. While on that subject one of our other readers, Zaheera, is wanting to find out about good daycare centres and creches in Cape Town, as well as nursery schools, particularly Montessori. If you have any suggestions for her please let me know by posting to the forum. |
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We have a winner! Congrats to the following readers: Toy giveaway: Debbie Emery and Bettie Deetlefs and Acorn Giveaway: Kim Worrall. Toybox Toys can be ordered from Di on 021-6718690 and Acorn Products can be ordered from Tanya on 021-5594694. |
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While on holiday in Langebaan a couple of weeks ago my husband and I took Megan to Scotts Nursery on the road between Vredenberg and Saldana. It was fantastic for Megan, with a jumble of farmyard animals (tortoises, goats, donkeys, rabbits and lots of chickens roaming around) - and she got to experience her very first horseback ride on a tiny pony - for only R5! A small bag of animal food is also a good idea to keep the little ones busy while you browse for plants. The nursery also has a lovely safe play area with swings, slides and a see-saw, and the tea was also delicious. Be warned - they don't take credit cards, however the manager was prepared for us to do a bank transfer when we got back home if we didn't have enough cash for tea! How often do you come across that? So if you ever do find yourself and your family in the area, pop in for a lovely treat! |
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Next issue: Holiday Special! Lots of giveaways and holiday ideas! Post any questions or issues that you feel need to be discussed on the message board at www.mumstheword.co.za - whatever grabs you! Your comments on MTW would also be hugely appreciated. |
In
Closing…
Again this month has flown by, Megan's birthday is nearly here and already we have had our first Barney party of the season (one every weekend for the next month!). In between all the frantic preparations I hope to meet some of you at the book launch, otherwise have a good month and see you again in December! As always, I am on the lookout for any contributions, connections or submissions, you know how to reach me (for those porridge brains out there it's sally@mumstheword.co.za)! Please also keep sending your newsletters on - and feedback is always welcome!
Until next time…
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